Being jointly aware about how relationships develop gives you a chance at dedicated love, and you can both relax and explore on the way.
It takes time to get to the point of devotion. Too many jump into commitment too premature.
Have you ever done that? Just like a fairy tale with a first date and then living happily every after? It is a fairy tale! The real world is that love takes time. Take each of the three stages to get there.
Phase One – First Dates
This is the exploratory stage. Everything’s very preliminary.
It is not time yet to be thinking about a possible future together, simply checking out the other, and seeing if you’re interested enough for future dates.
Link chemistry’s physical, psychological, and spiritual. The physical is often obvious… do you discover the individual physically attractive? Would you like the eyes, Bird Control, mouth, body type? What about the voice and laugh, even the accent?
How does the person smell to you? What about the sense of touch when you shake hands or even kiss? What about taste?
If somebody smells or tastes of smoke, is that a game-changer for you? Some things won’t ever change. Some things will or can change over time, but right now you are at the point of first impressions through the five senses.
There’s also the emotional and spiritual connection that’s part of early chemistry discovery. How’s the conversation? Do you share similar interests and life views?
Phase Two is the Honeymoon
The Honeymoon’s special. It is something many couples work to keep aspects of later in their relationships.
You see one another frequently. You have a good deal of fun and excitement together as you get to really know one another.
The honeymoon can last for a month or two, or up to a year. It ends as you get to recognize the humanity of your spouse. Your partner has flaws, and you start to see them.
For some, the honeymoon is all they need. They’ve a type of addiction to the thrill of the honeymoon.
They break up and move on as the honeymoon period evolves to its close. I call these folks 90-Day Wonders.
They’re great for a honeymoon, but lack the emotional maturity and stability to pursue a long-term relationship.
When the honeymoon with the rose-colored eyeglasses is ending, and you see one another’s lack of devotion, you may try to change one another.
You may struggle over who’s and who’s wrong in situations, beliefs, and attitudes. This is a power struggle.
If you can reach the point where you accept one another as you are, rather than try to change perceived imperfections, many relationships become more powerful and endure.
If not, breakup can occur, or, often worse, staying together and being miserable.
If the decision’s to take your partner, and vice-versa, the relationship can continue and develop in a wholesome way. You have given one another a chance at finding love.
Are you interested in living your life intentionally to create the life you want to lead? Research shows that using creative mindfulness is the best way to Design the Life You Want.
A big part of the life we want is a Love Relationship.